So, two-ish weeks ago, I started the 100 days of happiness.
Last week was fu-u-ull: husband gone. Vacation bible school nightly. Insomnia. Summer-crazed children. Lots of work stuff. Super hot outside. And insomnia (because seriously… that is the worst).
But there were happy things every day.
But I got sick of posting on Facebook.
I have not posted a status since the wee hours of Friday… almost 4 days. And… and…
I don’t miss it.
Oh, I’m checking still. There are friends whose faces and observations I enjoy seeing. There are posts to make and moderate for both of my jobs. But… yikes. I just feel overloaded….
an abundance of digital communication,
an utter lack of real, substantive communication.
I acknowledge that I have gotten to the point in my life in which it’s easier to send a note than dial a phone, preferable to check a status than ask a question. And I feel convicted about it. Checking up on or in with each other is a poor substitute for doing life together, which is what I crave. Don’t you? When we post our pictures or thoughts we give the illusion of being part of each other’s lives, but sometimes, when we reach out to touch someone, we come up short.
I want to do better. And in the mean time, I want to clear up some of the clutter in my head… the posts that irk me, the ones whose authors I have to take a moment to even place, the posts that seem to seek to divide or incite. I don’t need all those words and all that tension added to the stuff of real life.
So, I am working on a Facebook break. No, I am not declaring I AM DONE or deactivating for a set time. I am just backing away, holding it at arm’s length, reading some books.
And in the mean time:
The #100HappyDays experiment continues. I am being mindful to observe those happy moments and happy things, even in the long, loud days. Things like:
– Randa’s utter enthusiasm in planning and preparing a picnic for her friends on Friday.
– the way KK & Randa screamed and cheered and greeted their big sister Paige when she returned for a visit on Saturday.
– the way every mama in the room cried at the prayer of thanksgiving and life offered at a baby shower on Saturday.
– the way my husband appreciates my never-made-the-same-way-twice taco dip and my ever-growing baby bump.
– the stir fry I ate tonight.
– the fact that our childcare question for Sweet Baby has already been answered!
– a family dinner at Abuelo’s with all 7, er – almost 9! – of us.
– friends who dogsit
– friends who take our kids to the pool
– House of Cards
– signing Randa up for her 3rd year of dance (this year: ballet and hip-hop!)
– comfortable shoes
All those things were observed. Some of them were verbally shared with others. None of them were “posted” anywhere until now.
It still counts, though. In fact, as much as I love sharing and interacting with people I cannot see in real life, I want to make my words count more. I want to shake off the laziness of The Virtual and the precision of The Edited and focus on the beauty of being human, spontaneous, and able to talk.
The thought of it makes me happy :)