one of the most common arguements I have with my husband occurs when we try to edit each other.

Example:
I imply through sighs, looks, gestures, or sarcasm that he should discipline the kids differently, complete a chore more efficiently, or handle something the way I would.

Another example:
He gets exasperated when I express a certain feeling, because it’s not how he feels.

This is not earth-shattering. This is typical Mars vs. Venus stuff. God made men and women differently, so the chances of us handling our stuff in the same way all the time are slim to nill.

Another common one we women like to dish to each other about (at least in my circle of women) is that our husbands often don’t let us vent. We go off about this (perhaps the kids not listening to us) or that (perhaps something that one woman said to us), or we fret about a circumstance (money, our weight, our to-do list) and they think they have to fix it. Bad hair day? Honey, it looks fine. Mad at your mom? Just say something. Kids talking back? Don’t let them. To men, whom God equipped to be strong and decisive, the answers to our complex emotions are often seen as simple.

But sometimes, we are not looking for a solution. Whether we are male or female, sometimes, we see that our circumstance, be it stressful, hurtful, frustrating, sad, is something that, for the moment, cannot be changed. And if we are mature enough, we know that we need to have faith to get through, because we don’t know the whole story yet ~

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5

…but because we are human, we might sometimes indulge in a moment of whining. Or crying. Or just being pissy about it. But we’ll be fine. We’ll deal with it and move on.

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And with that lengthy introduction, I have to say kindly, gently, gratefully, that Rod and I are not moving ‘back.’ We don’t see moving back as a solution to our circumstances (nor is the prospect even practical, since our house is rented out, we had it up for sale for a year, we couldn’t find jobs in Chicagoland anyway, and it costs thousands of dollars and a lot of stress to move a family halfway across the country, and we already did that this year.) We might indulge ourselves in moments of doubt or even anger, but we know that we know that we know that we are home, where we are supposed to be for this time, and we have no desire to uproot our kids and our lives back to the midwest.

Well, I do have a desire to have unlimited airfare so I can go back once a week or so and have coffee with my friends, hang out with my parents, kiss my niece’s sweet cheeks, and eat Aurelio’s Pizza or El Cortez, but that’s a different thing.

Our season of waiting, of things not going how we expected or wanted them to, does not equal our second-guessing. And I must apologize if I ever give that impression. We are here because we believe it’s where we are supposed to be. We aren’t sure of everything we are supposed to be doing yet, but we are learning, growing, and trying to calm ourselves while our journey winds around this bend.

’cause I believe the next view is going to take our breath away. And when I see it clearly, you’ll hear me shout all the way in Chicagoland.

Comments

comments

  • lizzyandmrdarcy

    Great post, as usual. The ups and downs of life after a move…adjusting, doubting, fear, sadness, peace, acceptance.